Understanding Grief
In the midst of loss, it can be comforting to know that others have walked this path before us and left words of guidance behind.
This section gathers articles of wisdom and compassion—pieces that have helped me, and that I hope may also help you. Some are written by hospice professionals, others by teachers, companions, and researchers who understand the waves of grief and the tender process of healing.
🌸 Scientific American – How the Brain Copes with Grief
This article was graciously shared with me by the hospice administrator who oversaw the team caring for my husband in his final days with cancer.
I found it to be both informative and comforting, as it shed light on the ways our brain responds to loss. It affirmed for me that patience and self-compassion are essential as we navigate the natural and painful process of navigating the shock of loss.
Shared with gratitude for this article, graciously provided by the hospice team.
💙 Finding Meaning in Grief by David Kessler
In Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief, David Kessler offers gentle reflections on how we can live with loss:
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Your grief is as unique as your fingerprint, and so is the meaning you find.
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Meaning does not take away the pain of grief. But finding meaning can be the difference between having the pain change you and choosing to grow from it.
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The goal is not to forget. The goal is to remember with more love than pain.
Excerpts from David Kessler, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief (2019).
🌿 Thích Nhất Hạnh
On Embracing Sorrow
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The tears I shed heal my heart. The more I cry, the more deeply I can smile.
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Our suffering is not separate from our joy; in touching one, we discover the depth of the other.
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The one you love is not gone; they continue in every breath and step you take.
Drawn from the teachings of Thích Nhất Hạnh, No Death, No Fear (2002).
🌸 Pema Chödrön
On Leaning Into Loss
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Rather than resisting emotional pain, we can meet it with tenderness. In opening to our sorrow, we discover a strength that carries us through change and impermanence.
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Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others.
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Grief softens us; what feels like breaking apart can also be the beginning of greater compassion.
From Pema Chödrön, When Things Fall Apart (1996).
🕊️ The Mourner’s Bill of Rights
by Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.
When we grieve, it can feel as if we’ve lost all sense of ground. In those tender moments, it helps to be reminded that our grief has dignity, and that we are allowed to walk this journey in
our own unique way.
One of the most compassionate resources I’ve found is The Mourner’s Bill of Rights by Dr. Alan Wolfelt. In it, he names ten simple, healing truths — such as “You have the right to experience your own unique grief” and “You have the right to treasure your memories.”
This list is like a gentle companion for the road ahead, offering reassurance that what we feel is natural and sacred.
👉 Read and download The Mourner’s Bill of Rights (PDF)
From Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt, The Mourner’s Bill of Rights, Center for Loss & Life Transition.
✨ C.S. Lewis
On the Weight of Grief
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No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.
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Grief is like a long valley, a winding valley where any bend may reveal a totally new landscape.
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Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything.
From C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed (1961).
Read the article → (link to Kornfield page
With appreciation for Jack Kornfield’s wisdom on honoring grief.
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“Love is the bridge between you and everything.”
Mesothelioma Resource
This informational resource, shared with me by The Lanier Law Firm, features an impressive AI tool that answers questions about mesothelioma.
I’m including it in my Understanding Grief Resources section to help raise awareness about this cancer and encourage early detection, which can improve the chances of survival.